Week 5, Chapter 13

Watzlawick labels a family as a system. I think his idea makes a lot of sense. A family works together to bring out the best of each other, to be there for support and stay together. I liked Watzalawick's description of a family being like a "mobile suspended from a ceiling... Tug any string, and the force sends a shock wave throughout the whole network." (p. 170) I relate to this very well. I am the youngest of 6 children. There is a 19 year age difference between my eldest brother and I. When I was born, and when I was a child, my older brothers and sisters were in there teens. My eldest brother died in a motorcycle accident when he was 17, my mom's first husband died in a car accident, my elder sister ran away and my other two brothers and sisters got into drugs. I was born and raised in their time of grieving and pain from the loss of our loved ones. I was young, so I didn't necessarily understand why my older brothers and sisters would act the way they did, I was just told that they were making "bad choices". It seemed like everyone's actions effected all of us. If my brother or sister were in trouble, I would see if effect my parents in a negative way, which would effect me in a negative way. It was exactly like the mobile effect, and almost like a domino reaction.
When I became a teenager, I got into a lot of trouble too. To me, I thought it was normal because I grew up with it. When I was negative and doing bad things, it effected my parents. they were angry and more stressed out. It was like a never ending fuse. Yet when I became happier and stopped getting into as much trouble, I saw my parents become more happier and we could actually have a civil coversation without any arguing. I used to think that I would never be able to talk to my parents again after what we went through when I was a teenager, but now I am really grateful that we can. My father told me last Christmas that "seeing me happy makes the whole household a lot happier".